Verne Strickland Blogmaster / May 25, 2012
Founder and Editorial Director, The Traveling Yeti
Posted: 05/25/2012 11:05 am
I sit in the break room rehearsing the lines over and over. The
fluorescent lights, white walls, drinking fountains and lunch tables
make me feel like I am sitting in my high school's cafeteria. But
instead of sitting with my old classmates, I am surrounded by men in
uniform and VFW members.
The next service will be for a WWII veteran.
"Say the first line 5 times. Then say the second line 5 times. Then say the last line 5 times," Cooper says to me.
This flag is presented by a grateful nation...This flag is
presented by a grateful nation...This flag is presented by a grateful
nation...This flag is presented by a grateful nation...This flag is
presented by a grateful nation,
it is an expression of appreciation for the honorable and
faithful service rendered by your loved one... it is an expression of
appreciation for the honorable and faithful service rendered by your
loved one... it is an expression of appreciation for the honorable and
faithful service rendered by your loved one... it is an expression of
appreciation for the honorable and faithful service rendered by your
loved one... it is an expression of appreciation for the honorable and
faithful service rendered by your loved one.
Please accept my sincere condolences. Please accept my sincere
condolences. Please accept my sincere condolences. Please accept my
sincere condolences. Please accept my sincere condolences.
I did as he said and by the time I finish saying all three lines,
five times each, totaling fifteen lines, my brain is too tired to think
about the anxiety. But, nonetheless, the anxiety is there. I can feel my
stomach continually tighten underneath my dress greens.
"Don't worry; I was nervous the first time too. But the nerves go away and you will be able to say it just fine."
The sound of Cooper's words comfort me but I can only half listen to
what he is saying. I am repeating the lines over and over in my head.
The thoughts are so loud and fast that everything outside of my head
sounds like background noise.
This flag is presented by a grateful nation,
I had participated in countless veterans' funerals in the past two
weeks. Sometimes there were more than four in one day. I was able to
make it through so many services because I did not have to look or
interact with the bereaved during the last two weeks.
My sole
responsibility was to take the flag off of the coffin with my fellow
soldier performing the funeral with me. I would then fold the flag into a
perfect triangle. My partner would tuck the other end of the flag into
the corners and make sure it looks like a giant, blue paper football
covered with stars. The flag would then be taken from me and presented
to the next of kin.
it is an expression of appreciation for the honorable and faithful service rendered by your loved one.
Folding the flag was more work than presenting it, but I did not have
to speak to the next of kin when folding. I did not have to look into
their eyes and see their sorrow. I did not have to hold myself back from
giving them a hug and trying to comfort them without just the use of my
words.
All of my anxiety and continuous repeating of the lines make the thirty
words that need to be said feel like I am required to publicly state the
entire WWII memoir,
With the Old Breed.
Please accept my sincere condolences.
It is time to make the way down to the benched service area where the
funerals are performed. Polacek, Cooper and I wait at the end of the
driveway for the family to arrive. The funeral procession shows up and
we salute the hearse as it approaches. I can see the flag on top of the
coffin through the windows as it passes. We wait for the pallbearers to
unload the coffin, then the three of us drop our salute.
I unconsciously went through all of these moves while I consciously kept repeating the words over and over in my head.
This flag is presented by a grateful nation,
Polacek and I walk to opposite ends of the coffin where we raise
another salute when Cooper begins to play taps. My heart gradually
begins to beat faster.
it is an expression of appreciation for the honorable and faithful service rendered by your loved one.
Once taps finishes, Polacek and I pick up the flag while my heart is under the impression that my body is running.
Please accept my sincere condolences.
Polacek begins folding.
This flag is presented by a grateful nation... This flag is
presented by a grateful nation... This flag is presented by a grateful
nation...
Each fold he gets closer to me.
Thisflagispresentedbyagratefulnationforthehonorableandfaithfulservicerenderedbyyourlovedone
My heart thinks my body is in a full sprint.
This flag by a grateful nation service and honorable presentation of your loved one
Both my mind and heart are on overdrive.
Please accept my MOST HEARTFELT AND MOST HUMBLE CONDOLENCES YOU WILL EVER HAVE FROM SOMEBODY! EVER!
Polacek finishes folding the flag and I tuck in the corners. I manage
to see past the numerous television screens blaring different messages
in my brain, and notice Polacek giving me a look. The look is telling me
that I do not need to worry and that the next forty-five seconds will
go exactly how the Army would expect.
I take the flag and my head goes silent. No words. No lines.
The next of kin, a middle aged man that is probably the veteran's
son, is sitting in front of where I am standing and I approach him
slowly. I do not have any courage to look at his face and I do not dare
look anywhere near his eyes.
I kneel down in front of him.
................................
All of the words I had countlessly repeated in my head are lost in
the cosmos of my brain. The motors are burnt out and no words come out
of my mouth. Time ceases to exist. I heard and felt every heartbeat.
Every pair of eyes in attendance at the funeral feel like individual
sources of heat radiating in my direction.
I look up and see this man's eyes. My heart aches when I see his sorrow as he is holding back tears.
The eternal five to ten seconds end and I know something needs to be
said. My mouth starts moving without any assistance from my brain.
"The service from your loved one will never be forgotten from the
continued memories by you and your family. Keep him in your heart and
always cherish the service he provided for all of us to live comfortably
and enjoy our beautiful country. Please accept my sincere condolences."
At least I had managed to get the last part correct.
I stood up and saluted him, then marched back towards the end of the
driveway where Polacek and Cooper were waiting for me. While marching, I
go over the last five minutes in my head. I was disappointed with
myself that I had a mental collapse and blanked on almost everything I
had rehearsed prior to the service. But, I am happy that what I did say
was something that came from my heart and not was written on a card that
was issued to me.
When witnessing a veteran's funeral, a person will notice that every
move is made with robotic precision. This is created by the discipline
the military has taught every soldier from their first day of service.
Nonetheless, every soldier that has the honor of performing this service
can feel the humanity and the strong emotions that are tied to that
task.
The faces of the soldiers are expressionless, but their hearts are
closely connected to each veteran that has passed away. Every day
countless veterans leave us, and every person that has served in uniform
mourns their loss.
I do not know the person that is being buried at Rittman National
Veteran's Cemetery this morning. But I know that this person fought in
one of the greatest wars our world has ever known, so my country and the
rest of the world would not have to live under fascist rule. For that, I
am forever grateful.